A Girl, Her Body and Her Instagram

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I’m a 20-something-year-old successful woman and I post my half naked body on Instagram. Why? Because I can and that’s completely acceptable.

Let me explain…

I grew up in an ultra-conservative household with a lot of rules of what I could do and how I could dress. I was taught ‘modesty is the best policy’ (literally the most-tacky quote ever). I was not taught about sex and never received sexual education in school. The only thing I knew was that I wasn’t supposed to have sex until I was married. As a teenager dealing with ever changing hormones and typical teen angst, I was confused and struggling within my thoughts if I should just listen to my parents/church or figure it out for myself. Well THANK GOD I didn’t listen to them and eventually educated myself about sex and made my own decisions. I was definitely a late bloomer because of my upbringing but am actually really thankful for that because I would have definitely made some really poor decisions as a teenager. Over the years I’ve learned to love my body and that it is 100% okay to show it off on MY terms.

I think it’s so important to encourage women not to care what anyone thinks and realize you are strong and powerful and you can do what YOU want with your body. Don’t let society shame you from showing off your natural form. DO YOU.

So instead of being scared to post that sexy selfie that you think you will be judged for, just think about how it makes you feel. Do you feel empowered? Are you proud of how you look? Then fuck it. Post it.

I’ve heard girls say, “I don’t even know how to be sexy.”  I call bullshit — utter bullshit! There is no specific way to be sexy. If your confidence shines through in how you carry yourself then that to me is sexy. Sexiness is a state of mind and overall comes forth in your everyday being.

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One person that inspires me is Vanessa Vigil. She started an art show and fundraiser (that’s more of a movement then art show at this point) called Not Ur Baby.  I asked Vanessa what she thought about women showing their bodies off on social media and here’s what she had to say, ‘People find empowerment in different ways. It all stems from something in their past that affects how they want the world to perceive them when they finally find their voice. If you find power in your modesty, that’s okay too. It’s getting old judging people on how they choose to show or not show off their body.”

I also asked her to share a little bit more about Not Ur Baby and how the show came to be, “Not Ur Baby is female dominant show and benefit for human trafficking. It started off as a frustration from being constantly surrounded in/participating in shows that were thrown by men, with male artists, for a male audience. Women and men are two different humans, and we express ourselves differently. I wanted to give women artists a platform to share their work. I know there are so many talented women in the bay area, but I wouldn’t see their work up at shows.

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Other than the logistics of the show. NUB & NUB2 made an impact on the Bay Area community of women and an even bigger impact on my life than I ever imagined. The show provides a safe space for women. I’ve been told that the energy in the space was like nothing they’ve experienced. That it was a space full of feminine magic and healing.

Another woman who I admire on the forefront of the body positive movement is Amber Rose. Amber Rose, who is famously known for her former relationship with Kanye West, is now the amazing model/mom/entrepreneur that started the highly successful Slut Walk in Los Angeles. The Slut Walk is an event and worldwide campaign focusing on women’s empowerment. The major issues that Slut Walk tackles are sexual injustice, victim blaming, derogatory labeling and gender inequality. The event is held in Downtown LA and features sex positive speakers, artists, musicians, comedians and vendors.

You can learn more about the Amber Rose Slut Walk here: amberroseslutwalk.com

Need some help feeling sexy? How about a little DIY? Check out these goodies all from local Bay Area brands.


I realize society expects women not to act like sexual beings but it’s 2016 and I’m sick of men getting away with expressing their sexuality without any recourse while women continue to sit here being judged for every ounce of sexuality they display. It’s time for a change. I am NOT a slut but if I want to post a lingerie picture on social media- no one can tell me otherwise. Everyone is different and if that’s not your way of feeling empowered then don’t do it but don’t let society convince you that it’s wrong. Make your own decisions.


Written by Becca Mikesell, illustrations by Kayla Soler — Get more Bay Area culture daily. Don’t forget to subscribe to our newsletter.

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